two cover letters for jobs

JOURNAL / BLOG ENTRY
I've been going through some past emails, looking for examples of my absolute unrivalled genius and maybe some inspiration for more writings. Needless to say, it's all amazing, but I'll be including a piece here & there going forward.

I wish I still had the link to the writing job listing 'cause it was hilarious. Which is why I sent them the following... They tongue-in-cheek said they were seeking well travelled, career driven freaks into ladder climbing and monosyllabic writing.


Hi Hello...

I should start off by saying that I'm not career-driven nor freakish in my ladder climbing, so that would make me 0 for 2 however, I -would- love to write for Gawker Media's urban travel blog, Gridskipper. As proof of my mastery of monosyllabic communication, take this: I write well, you will see. and this: Well is how I write, uh-huh. and some of this: I am so the one who writes well, you dont even know. You're blown away, aren't you? It's ok, I have that effect on people. I travel, I will admit, moderately. If paid to travel, I travel on command. Faster, even. I am ridiculously urban obsessed to the point of stalking urbanity in only a raincoat. I not only work in my pajamas, I sleep in them - among other things I might or might not do in pajamas. I know my way around the web like I know the palm of my hand... and trust me, I kno... ahem.. ya.
My style is unorthodox but definitely has a voice. Or so I've been told. Which could useful to your site. Or not. Sadly, I lack professional experience but with a good editor, I believe I could
serve your slave needs quite well.

A few urban pieces from my blog:
- [sent them a link to some of my preferred journal entries]

they're all a bit antiseptic so as not to greatly offend parents and relatives but I can most certainly drop the self-editing, if needed.

Let me know what you think....
-Kory Dayani

strange, but I never heard back.
(still, it was fun typing that up)

Here's another cover letter I wrote. Really, whether it's successful or not, I highly recommend doing the absolute-honesty-approach from time to time. You feel so much better about yourself having done it:

Hello there...

I am interested in being a part of the 1iota team, it's true. Depending on the position(s) available, that is. Can you let me know what is? available, I mean.

I've attached my resume but feel free to delete it without reviewing it and simply know that I will be perfect for the job you're trying to fill. Because I will. You dont even know. But I'll show
you. Ohw ya. I went to school for documentary film, using an American Studies major as a vehicle to learn film skills... so it of course makes sense that I've been working in the telecommunications world for the past 7 years.

If I made you smile at all with any of the above, it was worth not kissing ass with a boring emailed cover letter.
-Kory-