Thursday, December 15, 2005

Donna Gail Dayani

hmm. ok.
I was in San Diego.
visiting my dad and brother and
observing the one year anniversary
of my mom passing away.
"passing away".
Let's talk about euphemisms;
or maybe not.
Let's talk about issue avoidance.
but not really....
Let's ... not...
really talk about it at all.
I've put off writing about it because
I obviously dont really want to write about it and
chances are, you dont want to read about it.
Why would you?
Because you "care"? care about what?
my family? me? my story?
a healthy expression of the stages of grief?
do you need to practice?
practice empathy, sympathy
What do you want to hear?
what can I possibly say
that 4000 years of mourners havent already
said in every conceivable way?
"It was hard", "it wasn't easy"...'s that? - not good, huh?
they're just words.
Do you need to see
the look on my dad's face
when he reminisces?
Or share my pain
to know I went through it?
Can you fathom the loss
of your mother,
of your father's wife,
of a woman who died
30 years younger than her mom did?
Why would you
if you haven't yet lived it?
until you're forced to.
There's just no reason to.
- When you do though,
and one year passes
and you do your thing
to honor and remember,
you'll know
that your way
is your way
to deal with grief.
Even if it's writing about it
but not writing about it.

1 comment:

Miz BoheMia said...

Beautifully written...

I'm sorry...

It's not about us. Just about remembering those loved ones who no longer are here and sending them a message each in our own way.

Yours was beautiful.